losin myself
took the day in soaked it in my skin
lost my mind in a moments time
thinking bout where i never been
what i never done
and why he just aint where i need him to be

i just been losin myself too much
waiting on things that arent coming my way
thinkin things that prevail over what should be there
and what isnt there
is what i need the most
but i'll just count my blessings and wait
for the moment when its all ok for me

took the night apart soaked it in my heart
found my life in the second i thought he was alright
thought about what was right
and who was wrong
and sometimes i seem to be so wrong
but so can he

and i just been losin myself so much
walkin down roads that dont go anywhere
spreading my wings when i cant fly
thought about takin a vacation
while waiting on him to get his act together
and tell me its not just show and tell
and someday it will be more important
to look back and laugh

whats my name again?
i cant seem to remember much of yesterday
the lightning strikes me so hard
that it shakes the sense outta me
and i fall over
just waitin on him to say he loves me
more than he loves myself

but i've been losing myself a lot lately
sayin its alright and he's just fine
waiting on the rain to fall
thinking it just wont ever come again
but the more i listen then
the more i know
he's there for me
even when i'm not there for myself

but there are times when i see
i've burned myself dry
waiting on myself
to wake up and realize
i needed to open my eyes
long before then cause
i've been losin myself too much
and i'm glad he's there to find me
when i need to be found
hope i can find him too
when its his time to be found

i just wish he would give himself time
to fade into me
cause i seem to keep fading myself
into him

***************

just me
if i peel away myself
do you think i'll find me
hiding somewhere underneath?
and if i wipe away the sand
will i find the castle
thats been lost there for years?

i thought the sky was falling
but i guess it was just me

when you wash away the skin
do you think you'll find yourself
living on top of some old bones?
and when you let out a thick breath
do you think you're whispering my name
when i cant even hear your voice?

i thought the boat was sinking
but i guess it was just me

if the wind knocks me over on my way to see you
do you think you'll come to rescue me
when you dont even know if you can survive?
and if the land starts to break with you on it
do you think i will snap you up
when i cant even snap myself up sometimes?
but babe i think i'll try

i thought the dead were talking in hymns
but i guess it was just me

it always seems to be me

May 2008