its you
i'm east of your perfection
in my precocious little world
i've got the bandages and the bruises
that point to where its all going slowly
its time i told myself
what that little girl inside of me already knew
that you're not coming back
and i'm not going anywhere

its not easy being me
and i think you knew that from the start
you know how to turn my insides out
the razor is falling faster than you think
put my candle down
let the flame go away
my weakness is just that
its you i see again in that picture
its you i see again in my head
i cant deny that you're scratched there
i cant erase what i dont want to lose

**************

he assured me
its going to be ok
i dont even estimate
the desire he puts in my mouth
its more than i can handle tonite

are you concerned with me
i’m changing faster than the sugar in your tube
faster than you can ever believe
i am not overly concentrating on what i need to see
cause i can forget just as quickly as i can remember
just who i am

take me away
break me and love me
and take me home
this is not my salt shaker
this is not my peppered love
i need your caramel to talk to me
i need the liquid kisses to feather over me
my farthing is fading
faster than my old blue jeans
he cant change my mind
i think i’ll stay the nite this time

***********

i'm so far away from myself
that the me that once shimmered
has faded far far away
and i cant seem to find myself this time
the map was smeared with water
and all the words look the same to me today.
and i think its too dangerous to go out and play

but if you can find me
then tell me to come home
cause there are things
and there are people
that need me here
i just cant seem to find my path
when the rain washed it far away

but what can i say
i cant seem to walk the straight line today
i cant seem to find
my own face in the crowd
i'm lost in my own surreal realm of wonders
and walking that curvy tight rope
that never can seem to stay in one place
i never did like rollercoasters anyway

every week i tend to be the last in line
when will i get my turn to be happy this time?

***************

miranda got a message from jesus last nite
he told her to tell you its alright
to sun yourself in the afternoon with me
cause we all need to take a little time

i know i am not perfect
i know i am not great
this is my test
to see if i can make this grade

miranda left me a message
dangling on my machine
it said god if your out there
please understand
we all make mistakesi try as hard as i can

but i know i am not perfect
and i know i'm not there
but if you listen to me now
i just might make it somewhere

bobby told miranda
thats its all okay
jesus told her to listen
he knows what to say
she only smiled
and left me a message
i know you're not perfect
but bobby sure thinks so
i think it would be best
if i were to go
cause my plastic jesus needs me elsewhere
but just so you know
i know you're not perfect
but neither am i

May 2008