silent screams
and bad dreams
lost in a jar of obsessions
and disillusions
too afraid of the silence
that speaks to me
in tongues

and i said
you change like the weather
but we're always changing
and i cant help if i am this way
the oceans dont come my direction
so where do i fall
when the shore isnt here
and i'm sure i'm not there

if the stars asked me
where will you go
if you go away
what can i say to them?
when the bandages come off tonite

my pages
ended
right when yours began
and the rain
washed away
the words i had written
in the sand
never build your castle
in the sand

and i'm not worried
i'm not too far gone
wrap me up
tuck me away
and i will be okay
if its okay with you

i said
you change like the highway
but you were always like that
curving me around your finger
holding me in
and i cant help
feeling how i feel
when i feel for you

but i'm not worried
and i'm not so sure
pin me down
and take me home
before i change my mind

just one more cigarette
and you never know
who your friends really are
and this "i am yours
and you are mine"
i dont understand it this time
and i've been pushed around
just a little too much
to keep from breaking
so excuse my pieces

and you said
baby you change like a monet
dont let time wash you away
youre much to beautiful
to let it all fade
and i said beauty isnt what it use to be
but if you want
you can keep me here
and dont throw away your key

*****************

thirteen miles east of nowhere
and i'm too afraid to sleep
three cigarettes left
and ten minutes til insanity
and if i'm right
too many bad dreams
will keep me up tonite

ten blocks west of a friday nite
and i got lost again
on my way home
from baker street
and its cadillacs
that gleam in the moonlight
talked me out of crying tonite

two weeks and i'm still alive
with one more bottle of wine
and i wont be sober anymore
and the days wont seem so bad
when i open my eyes
to find the daylight staring back at me
from this hallway

three am
the middle of november
and my voice scares me sometimes
when i've been alone too long
and i heard

you
made yourself stay awake
much too much more
and its hard
to breathe
when no one
will breathe for me
and my words get caught
in my own book

************

dont say its gonna be okay
when you dont know what okay is
and dont tell me its all gonna be alright
when alright walked out on me last nite
please dont say "we are one"
when one always ends up alone
cause i know
that i never was
the fantasy
of what you wanted to see
when you
dreamed of me

and baby
your boots can walk fast
when they walk on me
and i cant find your face
in my magazine
pass another bottle

but give me just one more day
and i'll be okay
just let me stay a part of your world
and your oceans
and let me and you
become the simple us
that so long have i waited
to hear
but i'd wait another year
if thats what you wanted me to do

May 2008